If I were Cinderella
I'd be outa this mess by now
My handsome prince come to rescue me
Somehow
I cried a river and I sailed it to the sea
There was no one there but me
So I wept a stream and I sailed it to the Ocean
And there was a waving motion
But it was just the water
I told myself I loved you
And that you would be there forever
Because without you I'm lost
There is no sky
If its not in your eyes
When you look at me
It's like there is nothing else to see
I can't remember when I last felt as good as I do now
You bring out the softer me somehow
This is sweet but it is sad
You are the rose I'll never have
You have the kiss I'll never steal
I am a bell that will never peal
I find myself waiting and I know there is nothing I can say to make it better. I stand, unsure for the first time in a long while. She lies in front of me and I can hear her screaming into her hands. She is writhing on the ground as if she is in pain. She sinks her teeth into her own flesh as I stand above her. She squirms, slamming her shoulders against the solid concrete. I have nothing to say. I contemplate my options for a moment, and then bend down and touch her arm. She stills, breathing heavily, finally exhausted. She rolls onto her back and looks up at the piece sky that is not hidden by the buildings on either side of us. We are in a dark alleyway, not unlike the one in Spiderman, where Mary-Jane gets mugged. She struggles to her feet, pushing herself up with her palms. I extend my hand to her and she looks up at me, surprised. She didn't know I was here. She accepts my aid and rises. We stare at each other for a moment.
"Who are you?" She asks, caution accenting every syllable. I ponder my answer carefully before I reply.
"I am," I pause, searching for the right words,"a friend." She nods, but in the little light I she her confused look. She steps around me, daring me to stop her. I don't. She runs to the safety of the sidewalk and disappears around the corner. I sigh, but a moment later she is back. Tentatively she walks up to me.
"Whoever you are, you saved my life. Here. It isn't much...."She says in a hurry, shoving a chocolate bar into my hand. This strange girl turns and runs back up the path and around the bend. This time she does not come back.
You Don't Know
There is a million things I want to say
To you every day
But I hold myself back
Because you don't know yet
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me,
Or break me,
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky.....
At night I will fall asleep and dream of you
Knowing there's nothing I can do
Knowing theres nothing I can say
But look at you and live another day
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me
Or break me
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky.....
I thousand times I write this song
And every time I get it wrong
I never find the right words to say
I never find the right notes to play
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me
Or break me
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me
Or break me
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky....
You don't know you love me
And you don't know you need me
You don't know I can make you
Or break you
Or make you cry
Or lift you up so you can touch the sky......
Yet.
'Woosh!' the bus doors slide closed as I step off on the first day of high school. I am the last one off and the bus pulls away behind me, taking with it all that I have left of my old middle school. I take a deep breath and step from the curb to the sidewalk outside FHS.
"Jade!" a shouts a voice, and my best friend Kelly runs to me. Into a blur of red and black I am pulled. I hug her back, feeling better immediatly. She called me at least 4 times the night before but I havn't seen her in person in a month.
"Where is the others?" I ask her, looking at her, finally. She has on her favorite red skinny jeans, a black skulk shirt and sweater. Her dark hair is in her usual pigtails.
"I don't know, I just got here-" She says, when she is cut off by two people screaming our names. We turn, and are once again enveloped in more friendly arms.
Silent
I am Silent
You do not hear me
Because I do not speak
And I do not speak
Because I have nothing to say.
Dark
I am Dark
You do not see me
Because I hide in the shadows
I hide in the shadows
Because I am....afraid
I am afriad.
I did not know before now,
But yes,
I am afraid.
I am afraid of the future
I am afraid of the dark
I am afraid of falling
I am afraid of the rotting hand o time
And that all important will become stale
Before it is discovered
I am Shadow
Blue and black and silent
Always there,
Ever listening
Never speaking
Foreboding
And comforting
I am behind the cowardly
In front of the brave
I am Queen of the night
Because in the night, I am not
Not afraid.
I shy from the pleased and bubbly and content
I cringe from the light, ever burning
Blinding,
Smiling.
You Are
You are everything I'm not
You are sweet and you laugh alot
You make me blush so hot,
You do
I'll fall asleep and dream of you
Knowing theres nothing I can do
I'll wonder
Are you dreaming of me too
You are mine
You are so fine
In in way to deep
I can't fall asleep
Silence
Silence
Erase
Erase
Brush
Smooth
Voice
Riddley voice
Twisting and turning
Like the roots of a tree
Green and brown and living
Speaking words, dancing words
Like a ribbon
Wrapping up my mind
In silky letters Stop! Stop!
Close book
snap.
GTG.
Not all stories begin with "once upon a time". Many of them begin with, well, just that; In the beginning.
So in the beginning there was Nothing. From Nothing came Everything, and Everything came to be. When Everything became it was divided into three forms, from which all we know was created. Those forms were, and are, called Mepesa, Nepergon, and Abra.
Mepesa is Time, in Ancient language. The forms would now be called Time, as I have already said, Balance, and Life. Everyone has their own ideas of which is most important. The materialistic say Life. Some say Balance, and others still say Time. The truth is that no one is more important then the another.
So this age was called the Old Times. It is said that the rivers flowed with gold and the trees boar the sweetest fruit.All was well. All was better then well.
One day from the sky came red lightning, so bright that all who saw it quaked in fear. Here and there the lightning struck until Balance was no more. And this Skyfire, as we called it then, was Traversa, change. As none of the Three Beginings could excist peacefully with out the others, Turmoil was created.
Turmoil was Evil. It was not like Evil but was it itself. And turmoil planted itself in the hearts of men. It was what withered the flowers and darkened the sky with rain. Turmoil was not Good. And because of Turmoil there was Fear. And thus the everlasting cycle became. Turmoil, Fear, Turmoil, Fear, Turmoil, until one day there will be nothing left to cause Turmoil and nothing left to Fear.
It was foretold by someone considered to be the most unworthy of all. She was a street girl, a simpleton, who did not even know how to write. Her name was Ella, although nobody knew that. While all huddled inside their homes she ran throughout the streets in a strange trance, yelling The Prophecy. The Prophecy said that one by one the Three Beginnings would be destroyed by Traversa. Ella has since fadded from records. So how do I know of her?
I'll give you a hint. My name starts with an "E".
Silent
I am silent
And invisible
You cannot hear me at home
Because I do not wish to compete with the other children
You do not hear me at school
Because there are too many of us
You do not hear me at TNB
Because I do not speak
And I do not go anywhere else
I am not a ghost
But a shadow
Yes, a shadow, always there
Watching whatever you do
And mimicing every move
But only in the day
In the night,
Shadows take over
I am Queen of the night
And you will be a night light
A small comfort to those who fear the night
Well they should
For shadows are powerful
Because they represent
The past
The future
The dark
The followers
And more, but it is light now and
The light weakens me
I am a vampire
No, I lied, I'm not.
Did you believe me?
Do you trust me?
How much?
With your homework?
With your life?
Do you love me?
How much?
Enough to not see the bad inside me?
Enough to care?
Enough to wonder how I am in the summer?
Enough to call me just to say hi?
Enough to cry when I die?
Would you cry?
If I died?
Would you sob
Or just sniffle?
Would you go on with you life and forget about me?
Or would you say in forty years, gee, its too bad she passed away. She would love doing this.?
Or do you love me at all?
Ask me no question
And I'll tell you no lies
Every time you look at me
I get butterflies
Every time I see your face
My knees begin to quake
My heart beat drums double time
My hands begin to shake
Every time I say this
I can never get it right
So I will wonder if love exists
While I fall asleep tonight
And in the morning when I wake up
I will wonder again
If love can even exist in a world
Full of so much pain
You are perfect
And I am not
You are as cool as ice
Compared to my face's hot
Can someone even love
A girl like me
I am young
Only thirteen
This age is like a curse
Because no one can see
How old I feel inside
How this small body isn't me
They say you have to be older
To even know what love is
I suppose I don't know
But I know I have a pretty good guess.....
Dec.4th, 2008
Today someone said to me "Only 21 days more 'til Christmas!" and they sounded so excited.
I don't like Christmas.
I mean, I like the idea of Christmas. Wrapped gifts under a sparkling fir tree, warm firesides and big dinners with friends and family alike. I like the thought that a small baby boy was born in a manger with sheperds and wisemen and kings and stars. But that is not what my Christmases are like.
Sure there are some good parts. The candlelight Christmas Eve service when I get to hold my own candle. Christmas morning, opening all the presents and seeing the delight on everyones faces. But lately, the good parts don't make up for the bad parts. Like how now, Mom and Dad are stressed out about getting gifts and giving gifts and who needs what and "oh, we need to cut wood for the fires" and the christmas tree getting and just the way they react to the Holidays. It seems like instead of "Yay, its almost Christmas, I hope that _ will like the thing I bought them" its more "Oh no! only 21 more days and I still have to get this for this person and who knows what I'm going to get this person and ..." It feels like they are not excited about Christmas, they are just stressed at having to do all these things.
And then theres the fact of money. In this "Failing Economy" as the teachers would say, money is tighter then usual. Then with the Holidays, everything is just bubbling over. Since September, and maybe even before, my parents have been scrimping to be able to buy presents. I guess my problem is I don't see why we have to designate a day to make our kids super happy, because happiness never lasts and the stress it brings to the adults just ruins it anyway, although us kids never let it show. Months after and they are still stressed because they spent so much money on Christmas and now they can't pay the bills. I wouldn't mind getting nothing if my family would be able to just spend a nice day together without worring about paying this months bills.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just weird.
From The Girl on the Computer aka me
i am
a girl
13
blue
sore
writing
i don't erase anything. never. all you read is written as the original. tee hee. waowwaowwaow....
Heres To You
Here's to all the blissfully ignorant
The peacefully innocent
Who never cried a tear in their lives
Heres to the easily subdued
Those who never clued in
Who never needed a shoulder to dampen
Heres to those who never wispered to the dark
Who never wondered if theres greener grass
Who never had a pointless question to ask
And heres to the slightly disoriented
With child-like naivety
Who were always just what they perceived to be
Everyday
Heres to those who never his behind a mask
Who never denied a pleasant task
Who never pretended to be someone else
Heres to the smiling blonds
With faerie godmothers to wave magic wands
And they go to balls
And have dreams,
And princes
And happily-ever-afters
Everything I haven't got
Everyone who i am not
Heres to you, you lucky child
Have a nice life.
~jade
Jade
"Enter." The voice hissed. I stepped in the dark room, trying not to show my fear. Father did not speak to me like this often. In fact, he did not speak to me at all. Some might think this cruel, but that was the way we liked it.
"Father." I said, kneeling on the hard floor, bowing until my head pressed against the cold tiles. I knew I had done something incredibly wrong, though I could not think what it would be. I had been good in the past week. I shivered. It was freezing.
"You are a disgrace." His entire body was hooded, just as it always was. All I could see was his thin wrinkled lips, speaking words as poisoned as a snake. I clenched my fists tight, digging my nails into my palms. "You have failed me. You will never carry on the family tradition. You have a soft heart. I have known since you were a child. I should have killed you then." He raised his hand and I found myself squeezed against the wall by some unseen force. I could feel an invisible hand slowly crushing my windpipe until I could only wheeze. I clutched at my throat trying to pull away the brutal strength that was killing me.
"Father..." I whispered. He contemplated me for a moment. My vision was filled with rushing black dots. Then my head cleared and I fell to the ground, coughing and choking. When I finally got my breathing under control. I looked up at him. This man. My Father. What a sick word. For most it meant the leading male role in a child's life. For me in meant the man who had almost killed me, many times.
A hand reached down and smacked my face, first on the right, then on the left. I could feel my cheeks already beginning to bruise. "Get out." He whispered, and I jumped up and scurried from the room as fast as I could, bowing on the way out. I ran to my room and collapsed on my bed. I screamed into my pillow until I passed out.
You
How are
I've missed
I can't live without
You
You don't even know...
How much you mean to me...
You're all I'll never be...
You are the sky...
I am the sea...
You are the wind...
I am the trees...
I am lying in my bed
with my clothes still on
it is early; the sun has only just set
and I am cold
I am starring at the wall
As if to look away is to die
The radio is playing
Is music coming out?
I don't notice.
I don't move but to breathe
In and out, in and out
A simple pattern
Is there nothing i can do?
No, so I shall lay here until mom makes me change and asks if I'm sick and i say yes so as not to worry her and i will close my eyes and try to sleep until i do then i will wake to the screech of that stupid alarm and get up and live this life again, where nothing memorable will happen except maybe I will make a sleepy and grumpy Sarah laugh, like I do, and maybe I shall coax Henderson out of a foul mood, and yes JKH, you do get into foul moods. Will you read this I wonder? Maybe you will. please get him to mrs.green, because I know you read these and yes, its true, its all true and i depressed? i wonder...i have to leave. the table needs setting and i must sit and pretend to be interested in what they have to say. so farwell!
the sky is falling
run, chicken little
go and get eaten
because you are young
here come the pirates
waving their swords
(swords, a funny word)
i smile and raise my hand
they fall, screaming
in pain, this time
having had their thighs broken
(feamor, i believe)
brakka theirra kalfis
break their calves
"You came," she whispered, "I knew you would."
The sun had set. The first stars were just visible, more appearing every moment. The western sky was a rainbow of colors, blue at the top, then green. Reds, oranges, and yellows became more prominent as your eyes traveled closer to the horizon where the sun had just sank out of site. You turned back to the girl-child who, you suddenly realized, was a child no longer.
She looked at you with her all knowing eyes, wise and old, their color never really named. Sometimes they seemed purple, little violet stars shimmering like dew. Or green, clear and interested. Or blue, gray, brown, hazel, every color you could imagine. And in her eyes was the world, at its best, worst, and every stage in between.
You looked into her shinning young face, but don't reply. You didn't have an answer to give and she didn't want one.
So you stood, you didn't know for how long, just looking at each other. By the time either one of you spoke, night had truly fallen and the moon hung bright in the sky.
"You always know" you murmured, not moving an inch. Her eyes held yours. She smiled that mysterious smile, the smile that made you wonder if she was really only just emerging from childhood and not 100 000 years old.
"Yes," She breathed as quietly as possible, as if she was afraid to break the moment, "Yes, I always know."
And she closed her eyes.
-Jade
Untitled (Part 2)
The world jolted.
You had realized long ago that she never blinked, never slept, never closed her eyes anytime. You always wondered why, but, then again, there were many things you wondered about Aaeesha. Her hair was white, pure white even tough her age appeared around 14 or so. She was thin, like a starved child and her bones stood out against her skin.
Now that she closed her eyes, the world was falling. You reached out to grab her, to protect her from the turmoil and chaos surrounding you both. In the end, you felt her small, thin, strong arms encircle you the earth fell from beneath your feet, but she held you up. Her eyes remained closed while the sun turned red and fell from the sky. You tried to squeezed your eyes shut so you wouldn't see your beloved world crumbling into space, but they wouldn't stay shut. Then space was gone too. The sky was ripped like a sheet and black engulfed the nothingness. No, it was the nothingness. In your heart you knew- all hope was gone.
~Jade
You looked at her. Her eyes were still closed. As the turmoil came to a slow hush, you croaked " Aaeesha, whats going on?" it came out "Ashk, wahn gun na?" somehow she understood.
"That is not my name." She said, her voice harsh and so unlike her normal voice. It was cold and sharpe, like a cut from jagged ice. You swallowed, making sure your mouth was wet.
"Who are you?" you wispered, unable to believe you had been in bed only an hour before.
"That is for me to know, and you to find out, mortal." She snapped in the same voice. Then the two of you began to rise in the air, shooting up like a spout of water. You closed your eyes to stop them from tearing up from the air. Up you rushed, faster and faster, then you came to a sudden stop. Her arms unwrapped and despite the fact that she was not the Aaeesha you knew and was frightening you and was treating you like dirt's dirt, you held on to her. With inhuman strength she pried apart your arms and dispeared. To your immense suprise, you didn't fall. You reluctantly opened you eyes. You were in a place you have never seen before...
A Short Story
"Did it ever occur to you," He shouted "that maybe other people care about you? That maybe if you go and get yourself beaten to a pulp that your not the only one who hurts? That you worry us all sick when you go out on your own because we know you'll come back looking like this!" He gestured
impatiently to her beaten and broken body, her skin various shades of blue, green, red, black, purple and swelling. Blood dribbled down her shirt front. "That we wonder if your going to come back at all this time, or the next time, or the time after that? Oh no, you don't think about the rest of us. You just say 'oh woe is me wanh wanh wanh' and never care about how the rest of us feel? Sometimes your so selfish you make me sick!"
She turned her battered face away, but not before he saw the tears in her eyes. Only then did it fully dawn on him what he had said.
~Jade
My name is He said
Who are you?
I said
And he said no
Your name is not who you are
Well,
I began
My name is _
But I am And I love to
With my s
And I_
On the _ I am a secret
A (fill-in-the-blank)
Make yourself me by changing the
(fill-in-the-blank)
He said _and
She said and
Then they ed
their s out
blankblankblankblankblank
blackblackblackblackblack
Ask me no questions
I tell you know lies
He said
But thats not true
I with out questions and
I don't need your
So _ away
I said
You said
Then we laughed
At the _ nananananananananana
~Jade
The Fearless Are Afraid
I am the incredible,
The invincible,
Who is never afraid
Of anything.
Ask me no questions
And I'll tell you no lies
Every time you look at me
I get butterflies
Everytime I see your face
I feel my knees quake
And my heart stops
For a moment
Sometimes the Fearless are Afriad
The Couragous aren't so Brave
The Steady still fall Down
The Cheerful sometimes Frown
The Invincible have a Weakness,
Your mine.
"You came," she whispered, "I knew you would."
The sun had set. The first stars were just visible, more appearing every moment. The western sky was a rainbow of colors, blue at the top, then green. Reds, oranges, and yellows became more prominent as your eyes traveled closer to the horizon where the sun had just sank out of site. You turned back to the girl-child who, you suddenly realized, was a child no longer.
She looked at you with her all knowing eyes, wise and old, their color never really named. Sometimes they seemed purple, little violet stars shimmering like dew. Or green, clear and interested. Or blue, gray, brown, hazel, every color you could imagine. And in her eyes was the world, at its best, worst, and every stage in between.
You looked into her shinning young face, but don't reply. You didn't have an answer to give and she didn't want one.
So you stood, you didn't know for how long, just looking at each other. By the time either one of you spoke, night had truly fallen and the moon hung bright in the sky.
"You always know" you murmured, not moving an inch. Her eyes held yours. She smiled that mysterious smile, the smile that made you wonder if she was really only just emerging from childhood and not 100 000 years old.
"Yes," She breathed as quietly as possible, as if she was afraid to break the moment, "Yes, I always know."
And she closed her eyes.
-Jade
Untitled-Another One
"Did it ever occur to you," He shouted "that maybe other people care about you? That maybe if you go and get yourself beaten to a pulp that your not the only one who hurts? That you worry us all sick when you go out on your own because we know you'll come back looking like this!" He gestured
impatiently to her beaten and broken body, her skin various shades of blue, green, red, black, purple and swelling. Blood dribbled down her shirt front. "That we wonder if your going to come back at all this time, or the next time, or the time after that? Oh no, you don't think about the rest of us. You just say 'oh woe is me wanh wanh wanh' and never care about how the rest of us feel? Sometimes your so selfish you make me sick!"
She turned her battered face away, but not before he saw the tears in her eyes. Only then did it fully dawn on him what he had said.
~Jade`Titleless`
At the first it was great
But you made the same mistakes
you always did.
I went along for so long
And in my head there was this song
over again.
I sat alone in the dark
And all my thoughts wandered far
from my head , (from my head)
I try not to leave
but the hard it seems to stay
Heres To You
Here's to all the blissfully ignorant
The peacefully innocent
Who never cried a tear in their lives
Heres to the easily subdued
Those who never clued in
Who never needed a shoulder to dampen
Heres to those who never wispered to the dark
Who never wondered if theres greener grass
Who never had a pointless question to ask
And heres to the slightly disoriented
With child-like naivety
Who were always just what they perceived to be
Everyday
Heres to those who never his behind a mask
Who never denied a pleasant task
Who never pretended to be someone else
Heres to the smiling blonds
With faerie godmothers to wave magic wands
And they go to balls
And have dreams,
And princes
And happily-ever-afters
Everything I haven't got
Everyone who i am not
Heres to you, you lucky child
Have a nice life.
~jade
A Haiku(I think)
Death is eminent
An end unavoidable
Are you scared?
Jade
Look up
What do you see?
I see a ceiling and a wall.
I close my eyes. What do i hear?
The radio, playing my favorite song.
And the click of the dogs nails on the floor.
What do I feel?
The plastic keys on my fingers and moms scratchy wool sweater on my arms.
What do I taste?
My favorite taste, a fresh clemintine, not too sweet, not too tangy, and reminding me of tictacs.
What do I smell?
I smell house smells. warm beds, pasta, fireplace fires...
So where are you right now? Never erase.
8:02
Verse 1
This is the song I've written a thousand times
A thousand times I dreamed that you were mine
If I could just forget you maybe I'd be just fine
You're the sky line
And I'll chase you 'til I die
Course
The best part of the day is 8:02
Because thats when I see you
Your eyes make every sky blue
And I can't wait for 8:02
Verse 2
I see the way you look at her
Like shes the only thing you see
I wish thats the way you look at me
You're a tree
And I wanna be the bird in your leaves
Course
Bridge
I miss you
Thats nothing new
I don't know what I would do
Without 8:02
If I were Cinderella
I'd be outa this mess by now
My handsome prince come to rescue me
Somehow
I cried a river and I sailed it to the sea
There was no one there but me
So I wept a stream and I sailed it to the Ocean
And there was a waving motion
But it was just the water
I told myself I loved you
And that you would be there forever
Because without you I'm lost
There is no sky
If its not in your eyes
When you look at me
It's like there is nothing else to see
I can't remember when I last felt as good as I do now
You bring out the softer me somehow
This is sweet but it is sad
You are the rose I'll never have
You have the kiss I'll never steal
I am a bell that will never peal
I find myself waiting and I know there is nothing I can say to make it better. I stand, unsure for the first time in a long while. She lies in front of me and I can hear her screaming into her hands. She is writhing on the ground as if she is in pain. She sinks her teeth into her own flesh as I stand above her. She squirms, slamming her shoulders against the solid concrete. I have nothing to say. I contemplate my options for a moment, and then bend down and touch her arm. She stills, breathing heavily, finally exhausted. She rolls onto her back and looks up at the piece sky that is not hidden by the buildings on either side of us. We are in a dark alleyway, not unlike the one in Spiderman, where Mary-Jane gets mugged. She struggles to her feet, pushing herself up with her palms. I extend my hand to her and she looks up at me, surprised. She didn't know I was here. She accepts my aid and rises. We stare at each other for a moment.
"Who are you?" She asks, caution accenting every syllable. I ponder my answer carefully before I reply.
"I am," I pause, searching for the right words,"a friend." She nods, but in the little light I she her confused look. She steps around me, daring me to stop her. I don't. She runs to the safety of the sidewalk and disappears around the corner. I sigh, but a moment later she is back. Tentatively she walks up to me.
"Whoever you are, you saved my life. Here. It isn't much...."She says in a hurry, shoving a chocolate bar into my hand. This strange girl turns and runs back up the path and around the bend. This time she does not come back.
You Don't Know
There is a million things I want to say
To you every day
But I hold myself back
Because you don't know yet
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me,
Or break me,
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky.....
At night I will fall asleep and dream of you
Knowing there's nothing I can do
Knowing theres nothing I can say
But look at you and live another day
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me
Or break me
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky.....
I thousand times I write this song
And every time I get it wrong
I never find the right words to say
I never find the right notes to play
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me
Or break me
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky
You don't know I love you
And you don't know I need you
You don't know you can make me
Or break me
Make me cry
Or lift me up so I can touch the sky....
You don't know you love me
And you don't know you need me
You don't know I can make you
Or break you
Or make you cry
Or lift you up so you can touch the sky......
Yet.
'Woosh!' the bus doors slide closed as I step off on the first day of high school. I am the last one off and the bus pulls away behind me, taking with it all that I have left of my old middle school. I take a deep breath and step from the curb to the sidewalk outside FHS.
"Jade!" a shouts a voice, and my best friend Kelly runs to me. Into a blur of red and black I am pulled. I hug her back, feeling better immediatly. She called me at least 4 times the night before but I havn't seen her in person in a month.
"Where is the others?" I ask her, looking at her, finally. She has on her favorite red skinny jeans, a black skulk shirt and sweater. Her dark hair is in her usual pigtails.
"I don't know, I just got here-" She says, when she is cut off by two people screaming our names. We turn, and are once again enveloped in more friendly arms.
Silent
I am Silent
You do not hear me
Because I do not speak
And I do not speak
Because I have nothing to say.
Dark
I am Dark
You do not see me
Because I hide in the shadows
I hide in the shadows
Because I am....afraid
I am afriad.
I did not know before now,
But yes,
I am afraid.
I am afraid of the future
I am afraid of the dark
I am afraid of falling
I am afraid of the rotting hand o time
And that all important will become stale
Before it is discovered
I am Shadow
Blue and black and silent
Always there,
Ever listening
Never speaking
Foreboding
And comforting
I am behind the cowardly
In front of the brave
I am Queen of the night
Because in the night, I am not
Not afraid.
I shy from the pleased and bubbly and content
I cringe from the light, ever burning
Blinding,
Smiling.
You Are
You are everything I'm not
You are sweet and you laugh alot
You make me blush so hot,
You do
I'll fall asleep and dream of you
Knowing theres nothing I can do
I'll wonder
Are you dreaming of me too
You are mine
You are so fine
In in way to deep
I can't fall asleep
Silence
Silence
Erase
Erase
Brush
Smooth
Voice
Riddley voice
Twisting and turning
Like the roots of a tree
Green and brown and living
Speaking words, dancing words
Like a ribbon
Wrapping up my mind
In silky letters
Stop! Stop!
Close book
snap.
GTG.
Not all stories begin with "once upon a time". Many of them begin with, well, just that; In the beginning.
So in the beginning there was Nothing. From Nothing came Everything, and Everything came to be. When Everything became it was divided into three forms, from which all we know was created. Those forms were, and are, called Mepesa, Nepergon, and Abra.
Mepesa is Time, in Ancient language. The forms would now be called Time, as I have already said, Balance, and Life. Everyone has their own ideas of which is most important. The materialistic say Life. Some say Balance, and others still say Time. The truth is that no one is more important then the another.
So this age was called the Old Times. It is said that the rivers flowed with gold and the trees boar the sweetest fruit.All was well. All was better then well.
One day from the sky came red lightning, so bright that all who saw it quaked in fear. Here and there the lightning struck until Balance was no more. And this Skyfire, as we called it then, was Traversa, change. As none of the Three Beginings could excist peacefully with out the others, Turmoil was created.
Turmoil was Evil. It was not like Evil but was it itself. And turmoil planted itself in the hearts of men. It was what withered the flowers and darkened the sky with rain. Turmoil was not Good. And because of Turmoil there was Fear. And thus the everlasting cycle became. Turmoil, Fear, Turmoil, Fear, Turmoil, until one day there will be nothing left to cause Turmoil and nothing left to Fear.
It was foretold by someone considered to be the most unworthy of all. She was a street girl, a simpleton, who did not even know how to write. Her name was Ella, although nobody knew that. While all huddled inside their homes she ran throughout the streets in a strange trance, yelling The Prophecy. The Prophecy said that one by one the Three Beginnings would be destroyed by Traversa. Ella has since fadded from records. So how do I know of her?
I'll give you a hint. My name starts with an "E".
Silent
I am silent
And invisible
You cannot hear me at home
Because I do not wish to compete with the other children
You do not hear me at school
Because there are too many of us
You do not hear me at TNB
Because I do not speak
And I do not go anywhere else
I am not a ghost
But a shadow
Yes, a shadow, always there
Watching whatever you do
And mimicing every move
But only in the day
In the night,
Shadows take over
I am Queen of the night
And you will be a night light
A small comfort to those who fear the night
Well they should
For shadows are powerful
Because they represent
The past
The future
The dark
The followers
And more, but it is light now and
The light weakens me
I am a vampire
No, I lied, I'm not.
Did you believe me?
Do you trust me?
How much?
With your homework?
With your life?
Do you love me?
How much?
Enough to not see the bad inside me?
Enough to care?
Enough to wonder how I am in the summer?
Enough to call me just to say hi?
Enough to cry when I die?
Would you cry?
If I died?
Would you sob
Or just sniffle?
Would you go on with you life and forget about me?
Or would you say in forty years, gee, its too bad she passed away. She would love doing this.?
Or do you love me at all?
Ask me no question
And I'll tell you no lies
Every time you look at me
I get butterflies
Every time I see your face
My knees begin to quake
My heart beat drums double time
My hands begin to shake
Every time I say this
I can never get it right
So I will wonder if love exists
While I fall asleep tonight
And in the morning when I wake up
I will wonder again
If love can even exist in a world
Full of so much pain
You are perfect
And I am not
You are as cool as ice
Compared to my face's hot
Can someone even love
A girl like me
I am young
Only thirteen
This age is like a curse
Because no one can see
How old I feel inside
How this small body isn't me
They say you have to be older
To even know what love is
I suppose I don't know
But I know I have a pretty good guess.....
Dec.4th, 2008
Today someone said to me "Only 21 days more 'til Christmas!" and they sounded so excited.
I don't like Christmas.
I mean, I like the idea of Christmas. Wrapped gifts under a sparkling fir tree, warm firesides and big dinners with friends and family alike. I like the thought that a small baby boy was born in a manger with sheperds and wisemen and kings and stars. But that is not what my Christmases are like.
Sure there are some good parts. The candlelight Christmas Eve service when I get to hold my own candle. Christmas morning, opening all the presents and seeing the delight on everyones faces. But lately, the good parts don't make up for the bad parts. Like how now, Mom and Dad are stressed out about getting gifts and giving gifts and who needs what and "oh, we need to cut wood for the fires" and the christmas tree getting and just the way they react to the Holidays. It seems like instead of "Yay, its almost Christmas, I hope that _ will like the thing I bought them" its more "Oh no! only 21 more days and I still have to get this for this person and who knows what I'm going to get this person and ..." It feels like they are not excited about Christmas, they are just stressed at having to do all these things.
And then theres the fact of money. In this "Failing Economy" as the teachers would say, money is tighter then usual. Then with the Holidays, everything is just bubbling over. Since September, and maybe even before, my parents have been scrimping to be able to buy presents. I guess my problem is I don't see why we have to designate a day to make our kids super happy, because happiness never lasts and the stress it brings to the adults just ruins it anyway, although us kids never let it show. Months after and they are still stressed because they spent so much money on Christmas and now they can't pay the bills. I wouldn't mind getting nothing if my family would be able to just spend a nice day together without worring about paying this months bills.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just weird.
From The Girl on the Computer aka me
i am
a girl
13
blue
sore
writing
i don't erase anything. never. all you read is written as the original. tee hee. waowwaowwaow....
Heres To You
Here's to all the blissfully ignorant
The peacefully innocent
Who never cried a tear in their lives
Heres to the easily subdued
Those who never clued in
Who never needed a shoulder to dampen
Heres to those who never wispered to the dark
Who never wondered if theres greener grass
Who never had a pointless question to ask
And heres to the slightly disoriented
With child-like naivety
Who were always just what they perceived to be
Everyday
Heres to those who never his behind a mask
Who never denied a pleasant task
Who never pretended to be someone else
Heres to the smiling blonds
With faerie godmothers to wave magic wands
And they go to balls
And have dreams,
And princes
And happily-ever-afters
Everything I haven't got
Everyone who i am not
Heres to you, you lucky child
Have a nice life.
~jade
Jade
"Enter." The voice hissed. I stepped in the dark room, trying not to show my fear. Father did not speak to me like this often. In fact, he did not speak to me at all. Some might think this cruel, but that was the way we liked it.
"Father." I said, kneeling on the hard floor, bowing until my head pressed against the cold tiles. I knew I had done something incredibly wrong, though I could not think what it would be. I had been good in the past week. I shivered. It was freezing.
"You are a disgrace." His entire body was hooded, just as it always was. All I could see was his thin wrinkled lips, speaking words as poisoned as a snake. I clenched my fists tight, digging my nails into my palms. "You have failed me. You will never carry on the family tradition. You have a soft heart. I have known since you were a child. I should have killed you then." He raised his hand and I found myself squeezed against the wall by some unseen force. I could feel an invisible hand slowly crushing my windpipe until I could only wheeze. I clutched at my throat trying to pull away the brutal strength that was killing me.
"Father..." I whispered. He contemplated me for a moment. My vision was filled with rushing black dots. Then my head cleared and I fell to the ground, coughing and choking. When I finally got my breathing under control. I looked up at him. This man. My Father. What a sick word. For most it meant the leading male role in a child's life. For me in meant the man who had almost killed me, many times.
A hand reached down and smacked my face, first on the right, then on the left. I could feel my cheeks already beginning to bruise. "Get out." He whispered, and I jumped up and scurried from the room as fast as I could, bowing on the way out. I ran to my room and collapsed on my bed. I screamed into my pillow until I passed out.
You
How are
I've missed
I can't live without
You
You don't even know...
How much you mean to me...
You're all I'll never be...
You are the sky...
I am the sea...
You are the wind...
I am the trees...
I am lying in my bed
with my clothes still on
it is early; the sun has only just set
and I am cold
I am starring at the wall
As if to look away is to die
The radio is playing
Is music coming out?
I don't notice.
I don't move but to breathe
In and out, in and out
A simple pattern
Is there nothing i can do?
No, so I shall lay here until mom makes me change and asks if I'm sick and i say yes so as not to worry her and i will close my eyes and try to sleep until i do then i will wake to the screech of that stupid alarm and get up and live this life again, where nothing memorable will happen except maybe I will make a sleepy and grumpy Sarah laugh, like I do, and maybe I shall coax Henderson out of a foul mood, and yes JKH, you do get into foul moods. Will you read this I wonder? Maybe you will. please get him to mrs.green, because I know you read these and yes, its true, its all true and i depressed? i wonder...i have to leave. the table needs setting and i must sit and pretend to be interested in what they have to say. so farwell!
the sky is falling
run, chicken little
go and get eaten
because you are young
here come the pirates
waving their swords
(swords, a funny word)
i smile and raise my hand
they fall, screaming
in pain, this time
having had their thighs broken
(feamor, i believe)
brakka theirra kalfis
break their calves
"You came," she whispered, "I knew you would."
The sun had set. The first stars were just visible, more appearing every moment. The western sky was a rainbow of colors, blue at the top, then green. Reds, oranges, and yellows became more prominent as your eyes traveled closer to the horizon where the sun had just sank out of site. You turned back to the girl-child who, you suddenly realized, was a child no longer.
She looked at you with her all knowing eyes, wise and old, their color never really named. Sometimes they seemed purple, little violet stars shimmering like dew. Or green, clear and interested. Or blue, gray, brown, hazel, every color you could imagine. And in her eyes was the world, at its best, worst, and every stage in between.
You looked into her shinning young face, but don't reply. You didn't have an answer to give and she didn't want one.
So you stood, you didn't know for how long, just looking at each other. By the time either one of you spoke, night had truly fallen and the moon hung bright in the sky.
"You always know" you murmured, not moving an inch. Her eyes held yours. She smiled that mysterious smile, the smile that made you wonder if she was really only just emerging from childhood and not 100 000 years old.
"Yes," She breathed as quietly as possible, as if she was afraid to break the moment, "Yes, I always know."
And she closed her eyes.
-Jade
Untitled (Part 2)
The world jolted.
You had realized long ago that she never blinked, never slept, never closed her eyes anytime. You always wondered why, but, then again, there were many things you wondered about Aaeesha. Her hair was white, pure white even tough her age appeared around 14 or so. She was thin, like a starved child and her bones stood out against her skin.
Now that she closed her eyes, the world was falling. You reached out to grab her, to protect her from the turmoil and chaos surrounding you both. In the end, you felt her small, thin, strong arms encircle you the earth fell from beneath your feet, but she held you up. Her eyes remained closed while the sun turned red and fell from the sky. You tried to squeezed your eyes shut so you wouldn't see your beloved world crumbling into space, but they wouldn't stay shut. Then space was gone too. The sky was ripped like a sheet and black engulfed the nothingness. No, it was the nothingness. In your heart you knew- all hope was gone.
~Jade
You looked at her. Her eyes were still closed. As the turmoil came to a slow hush, you croaked " Aaeesha, whats going on?" it came out "Ashk, wahn gun na?" somehow she understood.
"That is not my name." She said, her voice harsh and so unlike her normal voice. It was cold and sharpe, like a cut from jagged ice. You swallowed, making sure your mouth was wet.
"Who are you?" you wispered, unable to believe you had been in bed only an hour before.
"That is for me to know, and you to find out, mortal." She snapped in the same voice. Then the two of you began to rise in the air, shooting up like a spout of water. You closed your eyes to stop them from tearing up from the air. Up you rushed, faster and faster, then you came to a sudden stop. Her arms unwrapped and despite the fact that she was not the Aaeesha you knew and was frightening you and was treating you like dirt's dirt, you held on to her. With inhuman strength she pried apart your arms and dispeared. To your immense suprise, you didn't fall. You reluctantly opened you eyes. You were in a place you have never seen before...
A Short Story
"Did it ever occur to you," He shouted "that maybe other people care about you? That maybe if you go and get yourself beaten to a pulp that your not the only one who hurts? That you worry us all sick when you go out on your own because we know you'll come back looking like this!" He gestured
impatiently to her beaten and broken body, her skin various shades of blue, green, red, black, purple and swelling. Blood dribbled down her shirt front. "That we wonder if your going to come back at all this time, or the next time, or the time after that? Oh no, you don't think about the rest of us. You just say 'oh woe is me wanh wanh wanh' and never care about how the rest of us feel? Sometimes your so selfish you make me sick!"
She turned her battered face away, but not before he saw the tears in her eyes. Only then did it fully dawn on him what he had said.
~Jade
My name is
He said
Who are you?
I said
And he said no
Your name is not who you are
Well,
I began
My name is _
But I am
And I love to
With my s
And I_
On the _
I am a secret
A (fill-in-the-blank)
Make yourself me by changing the
(fill-in-the-blank)
He said _and
She said and
Then they ed
their s out
blankblankblankblankblank
blackblackblackblackblack
Ask me no questions
I tell you know lies
He said
But thats not true
I with out questions and
I don't need your
So _ away
I said
You said
Then we laughed
At the _
nananananananananana
~Jade
The Fearless Are Afraid
I am the incredible,
The invincible,
Who is never afraid
Of anything.
Ask me no questions
And I'll tell you no lies
Every time you look at me
I get butterflies
Everytime I see your face
I feel my knees quake
And my heart stops
For a moment
Sometimes the Fearless are Afriad
The Couragous aren't so Brave
The Steady still fall Down
The Cheerful sometimes Frown
The Invincible have a Weakness,
Your mine.
"You came," she whispered, "I knew you would."
The sun had set. The first stars were just visible, more appearing every moment. The western sky was a rainbow of colors, blue at the top, then green. Reds, oranges, and yellows became more prominent as your eyes traveled closer to the horizon where the sun had just sank out of site. You turned back to the girl-child who, you suddenly realized, was a child no longer.
She looked at you with her all knowing eyes, wise and old, their color never really named. Sometimes they seemed purple, little violet stars shimmering like dew. Or green, clear and interested. Or blue, gray, brown, hazel, every color you could imagine. And in her eyes was the world, at its best, worst, and every stage in between.
You looked into her shinning young face, but don't reply. You didn't have an answer to give and she didn't want one.
So you stood, you didn't know for how long, just looking at each other. By the time either one of you spoke, night had truly fallen and the moon hung bright in the sky.
"You always know" you murmured, not moving an inch. Her eyes held yours. She smiled that mysterious smile, the smile that made you wonder if she was really only just emerging from childhood and not 100 000 years old.
"Yes," She breathed as quietly as possible, as if she was afraid to break the moment, "Yes, I always know."
And she closed her eyes.
-Jade
Untitled-Another One
"Did it ever occur to you," He shouted "that maybe other people care about you? That maybe if you go and get yourself beaten to a pulp that your not the only one who hurts? That you worry us all sick when you go out on your own because we know you'll come back looking like this!" He gestured
impatiently to her beaten and broken body, her skin various shades of blue, green, red, black, purple and swelling. Blood dribbled down her shirt front. "That we wonder if your going to come back at all this time, or the next time, or the time after that? Oh no, you don't think about the rest of us. You just say 'oh woe is me wanh wanh wanh' and never care about how the rest of us feel? Sometimes your so selfish you make me sick!"
She turned her battered face away, but not before he saw the tears in her eyes. Only then did it fully dawn on him what he had said.
~Jade`Titleless`
At the first it was great
But you made the same mistakes
you always did.
I went along for so long
And in my head there was this song
over again.
I sat alone in the dark
And all my thoughts wandered far
from my head , (from my head)
I try not to leave
but the hard it seems to stay
Heres To You
Here's to all the blissfully ignorant
The peacefully innocent
Who never cried a tear in their lives
Heres to the easily subdued
Those who never clued in
Who never needed a shoulder to dampen
Heres to those who never wispered to the dark
Who never wondered if theres greener grass
Who never had a pointless question to ask
And heres to the slightly disoriented
With child-like naivety
Who were always just what they perceived to be
Everyday
Heres to those who never his behind a mask
Who never denied a pleasant task
Who never pretended to be someone else
Heres to the smiling blonds
With faerie godmothers to wave magic wands
And they go to balls
And have dreams,
And princes
And happily-ever-afters
Everything I haven't got
Everyone who i am not
Heres to you, you lucky child
Have a nice life.
~jade
A Haiku(I think)
Death is eminent
An end unavoidable
Are you scared?
Jade
Look up
What do you see?
I see a ceiling and a wall.
I close my eyes. What do i hear?
The radio, playing my favorite song.
And the click of the dogs nails on the floor.
What do I feel?
The plastic keys on my fingers and moms scratchy wool sweater on my arms.
What do I taste?
My favorite taste, a fresh clemintine, not too sweet, not too tangy, and reminding me of tictacs.
What do I smell?
I smell house smells. warm beds, pasta, fireplace fires...
So where are you right now? Never erase.
8:02
Verse 1
This is the song I've written a thousand times
A thousand times I dreamed that you were mine
If I could just forget you maybe I'd be just fine
You're the sky line
And I'll chase you 'til I die
Course
The best part of the day is 8:02
Because thats when I see you
Your eyes make every sky blue
And I can't wait for 8:02
Verse 2
I see the way you look at her
Like shes the only thing you see
I wish thats the way you look at me
You're a tree
And I wanna be the bird in your leaves
Course
Bridge
I miss you
Thats nothing new
I don't know what I would do
Without 8:02
Course x2
Ending
I
Love
You.....